WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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