Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
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