i would one night stand the shit outta him
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
