I only kidnapped one of them. chill
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
