OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
