I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
i think my mom watched the whole time
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
