It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
