i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
