I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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