Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize