The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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