I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
she pinky promised me she was 18
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
