The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize