I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
19 Parents Admit the Lies They’ve Told Their Children
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
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I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.