how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
zippers are such a cool invention
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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