yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Randomize
