Texts From Last Night

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  (231): View more from Michigan

  i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror

  (906): View more from Michigan

  its going to be a good night

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  (231): i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror (906): its going to be a good night http://tfl.nu/k4vc
  Replies (22) Good night (5360) Bad night (719)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.

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  (651): I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex. http://tfl.nu/qzkm
  Replies (7) Good night (3003) Bad night (345) Order T-Shirt
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.

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  (901): She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A. http://tfl.nu/01sf
  Replies (43) Good night (1756) Bad night (5586) Order T-Shirt
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.

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  (901): the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever. http://tfl.nu/iaa1
  Replies (29) Good night (965) Bad night (6432) Order T-Shirt
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.

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  (503): So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk. http://tfl.nu/hko9
  Replies (24) Good night (861) Bad night (5500) Order T-Shirt
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.

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  (402): I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song. http://tfl.nu/3qmr
  Replies (15) Good night (5939) Bad night (1058) Order T-Shirt
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops

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  (701): There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops http://tfl.nu/5t7t
  Replies (29) Good night (7880) Bad night (719) Order T-Shirt
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.

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  (217): i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood. http://tfl.nu/a0o1
  Replies (35) Good night (5064) Bad night (1573) Order T-Shirt
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.

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  (701): she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends. http://tfl.nu/prst
  Replies (13) Good night (886) Bad night (4028) Order T-Shirt
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!

  (1-859): View more from Kentucky

  please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"

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  (859): I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes! (1-859): please elaborate on, "atleast one ear" http://tfl.nu/8j2w
  Replies (20) Good night (6578) Bad night (1240) Order T-Shirt
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  (914): View more from New York

  I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.

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  (914): I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot. http://tfl.nu/n3sv
  Replies (7) Good night (3881) Bad night (817) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.

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  (717): Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home. http://tfl.nu/i7zp
  Replies (5) Good night (2203) Bad night (729) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.

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  (610): I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously. http://tfl.nu/zt1t
  Replies (10) Good night (1055) Bad night (2735) Order T-Shirt
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.

  (712): View more from Iowa

  Welcome to college.

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  (402): Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest. (712): Welcome to college. http://tfl.nu/tyv4
  Replies (9) Good night (1731) Bad night (411)
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  (936): View more from Texas

  Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check

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  (936): Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check http://tfl.nu/ivap
  Replies (4) Good night (683) Bad night (311) Order T-Shirt

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