the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize