I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
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