the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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