This girl is more easily done than said...
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
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recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
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My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
not ubering you a puppy
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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