the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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