I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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