I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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