Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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