Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
