that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
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