I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
There was a lot of him and a little penis
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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