just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
i think my cat just said my name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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