I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize