after a month anything with tits is on the radar
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize