apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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