I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize