I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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