Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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