what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
are you so shy because you have an std?
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.