Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Less talking, more tequila
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
