Will you blow on my dice?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.