Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.