Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
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