You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Randomize
