Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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