Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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