I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize