I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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