What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Randomize
