I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
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