We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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