Whod you bang
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
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he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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