first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
