Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
